Archive for April, 2011

Spelly Bee

posted by on 04/28/2011

Zoe was in the district finals of the 4th grade spelling bee on Tuesday, or as Troy calls it, “the spelly bee”.  She was knocked out by the word “embargo”, which she spelled as “Ambargo”, a mistake I am sure she never makes again.  Regardless, I am wicked proud of my girl.

spelly bee


Easter Monday

posted by on 04/27/2011

I managed to get drop dead, stab you in the throat sick this weekend, so our easter was a complete bust.  Plus, it was straight up a mini-blizzard on Saturday night.  I made Jeff drive me to the only department store in our town while I was running a fever and hacking up a lung (gross) because the children had no appropriate footwear to wear to church that wasn’t a sandal.  I have been in Colorado for ten years and I still can’t figure the weather out.  Also, I had been watching the ten day forecast for TEN days and it said absolutely nothing about snow on easter.   Not to knock weather people, but apparently I could be a weather man.  “Folks, looks like snow!  WHO KNEW?”

I said a mini prayer as I walked in the store because I could feel it:  I am so screwed.  Zoe wears a women’s size 7.5, which is an extremely popular size.  I wouldn’t know, I haven’t worn a 7.5 since I was in 3rd grade, no lie.  As I perused the aisles a few times and started to become semi-panicky, I spotted a pair of Converse that matched her outfit.  They had her size on display and I asked the man working if he had the other one in back.  While he went to look, I furiously googled “Can you wear Converse to church?” on my phone and went to look in the toddler section for Troy.

We did manage to dye eggs on Sunday.  Note to anyone without children:  Lose your illusions of grandeur; the eggs your children dye will never, ever look anything like the photos on the box.


We managed to go to church in the mud, rain, snow and ice balls.  As we were taking Troy back to the nursery, he asked if that was where we got the french fries.  I think he thought we were in a restaurant.  Perhaps we should visit church more often.


I made the children get dressed and we had our easter egg hunt on Monday (don’t judge).  Mostly I just wanted one decent photo of the two of them to commemorate the holiday, PAGING MOMMIE DEAREST.  Zoe protested, but dammit, put on your cardigan, grab your basket and so help me god, you better smile.

egg blocked

Troy put up a fight, he’s three and he’s really good at it.  Also, see the scratch under his eye?  HE POKED HIMSELF IN THE FACE WITH A PENCIL this weekend.  Easter 2011 almost went down as Easter 2011: Troy gets an eyepatch.

Y’all, I took 200 photos of them together and got two usable shots.  Two.  But the one I did get?  Love.

mah babies

Despite the fact that Zoe is wearing her sweater like a chola gang banger, it completely makes up for the fact that the other 198 look like this:

sweet face

And then on that glorious easter Monday, I made them hunt eggs.  Joan Crawford would want it that way.

egg hunt

There was an egg casualty.


Troy was disgusted.

And you show your sister.

So disgusted, he chased his sister with the carcass.

And then chase her with it.

It was the best easter monday in the history of the world.


I also used the prize egg that my grandma made many years ago, 1989 to be exact.  I was 12, which may or may not be to old to hunt eggs, but I kept that bitch to remind my sisters that I am the undisputed egg hunting champion of our family.

vintage prize egg

Zoe asked me if it was “vintage”.  Rude.


Neither one of my children found this egg.  Joan would have probably pelted them with pine cones.


A lady at church told Zoe that her cute shoes looked like easter eggs.

z + t

For the record, you totally can wear Converse to church.


Just don’t tell Joan.