You Take The Good, You Take The Bad, You Take Them Both And There You Have A Fireplace And Pneumonia

posted by on 02/05/2014 | 9 comments (leave one of your own)

I picked up the phone last week and put in one more call to my first choice in fireplace repair (it’s run by a retired fireman, I mean really) and an actual human answered the phone and I was able to recount the sad, downtrodden tale of my busted fireplace. It actually isn’t that downtrodden, long story short: shit doesn’t work and hasn’t worked for two years. I really needed the appointment maker lady to know just how incredibly serious I was in wanting to breathe life into my pathetic fireplace. She let me know that they are incredibly busy right now (it’s zero degrees, so yeah), but! I was able to make an appointment due to a cancelation and the fireplace tech dropped by the house yesterday.

He brought along his oddly quiet, extremely large fireplace vacuum. I snapped one photo on the dl while he went back to his truck to get some tools, I didn’t want to be a weirdo and frighten him away. Let’s pretend that the dumb bookcase situation isn’t happening on the left side of the fireplace and that you can’t see the printer cord hanging down under the desk on the right side of the fireplace. That would also be Troy home from school sick on the couch, this becomes important in a moment.


The tech removed the logs (I didn’t even know they came out), cleaned the fireplace completely, and had the pilot light on in about seven minutes. Apparently there was “air in the gas line” and some valve something or other that was “slightly clogged” (I typed slightly impaired but that’s not right) and check it: MY FIREPLACE WORKS.


He stacked everything back in nicely and added new sand and embers and only charged me the base price for a cleaning which was $129. I think he knew that the main problem was that I didn’t know how to light the fireplace correctly (I didn’t actually, our last one turned on with a simple switch) and decided it would be too easy to take advantage of my dipshitness.

Back to sick Troy. I took him to his doctor’s appointment shortly after the fireplace magician left. The doctor’s office had an opening for me to bring him in earlier in the day, but I informed them that I already had someone coming out for important fireplace repair because PRIORITIES. We came home after going from the doctor’s office to another office for his chest x-rays and waited and watched the weather get shittier and shittier. The doctor called with the results. As it turns out, Troy’s cough was walking pneumonia and I was overcome with guilt as I drove away from the house in negative cold weather on icy roads to pick up his medicine.


And then I came home and sat in front of my working fireplace and got over it.


He’s on meds and his fever is gone and his coughing is better and he said the “inside fire is the Love Fireplace” so imma run with it. Forgiveness never felt so warm.

  • Andrea

    My worst fear is that our gas fireplace stops working because it doesn’t even have a DOOR. How do you get in to fix something that has no entrance?

    Says the woman who has contemplated hiring someone to change the batteries in her smoke alarms.

    Glad T is OK.
    Andrea recently posted..I keep it on the mantelMy Profile

  • linda

    Funny and true! Priorities: check!
    linda recently’s to safe kids and paranoid moms!My Profile

  • Stephanie Precourt

    Oh I hope he’s okay!! I could write a post about our not-working fireplace. Well it works, but I can’t use it until it gets cleaned and I can’t get anyone out here to do it! Also I paid $100 to replace the remote control for it and the sensor doesn’t work. This was months ago! What is up with fireplace people???

    Stephanie Precourt recently posted..Turning 37My Profile

  • tara

    Nice work! I hate when fireplaces don’t work. Also, they’re confusing. My parent’s old one had a flu (flew?) how do you spell that? Anyway, I lit a fire once without opening it and smoked out the entire basement. Fun times.

    Poor Troy! I hope he feels better!! But with a love fireplace, how can he not?
    tara recently posted..would tina fey let you on twitter?My Profile

  • Sally

    Wish your guy went to Kansas City. We have tried forever to get someone out to JC and Kat’s house. Seems like they really don’t care for the business. Maybe I should learn the business! Might be more fun than tutoring math. Hard to imagine, I know.
    Hugs to Troy.

  • Dianinco

    Glad your cleaning went well. Had mine cleaned Christmas Eve. The Tech’s vac went haywire and blew soot ALL Over. Called company who sent out cleaners who cleaned but they also basically wiped the soot into the walls and ceiling. Now am waiting for them to send someone to repaint entire room. Took six floor scrubbings to get wood floors clean.

  • merlin513

    don’t feel too badly, walking pneumonia seems to be a fairly common diagnosis lately. I swear I had it at least 4 times when I was a kid.

    And I’m sure the inside fire is probably Troy’s favorite thing at the moment considering he ‘is’ a boy and it’s FIRE!!! In the house just makes it better!

    Congrats on getting it fixed and the proper spelling Tara is ‘flue’. 😀

  • Elaine A.

    It’s all good, you had appointments to get both things “fixed” that you really needed to and the order did not matter. No worries. 🙂

  • Anni

    It is a lovely fireplace and worth forgiveness indeed.. stay warm !

    xoxo, Anni

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