Archive for November, 2012

Forcing Paperwhites Into My Life

posted by on 11/26/2012

I’ve always wanted to have Paperwhites on my table for Christmas and I remember this like two days before December 25th and then it is too late. You have to be on your game and get them started around Thanksgiving.

I happen to be all over it this year.

And by all over it, I mean I was in Home Depot for the nine billionth time last weekend picking up something for the never-ending kitchen remodel and I walked right past a Paperwhite display and threw a pack of bulbs in the cart.

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According to my research and the instructions on the packaging, you plant these in a pot and it’s called “forcing Paperwhites”.  I think this is pretty rude, I don’t like to force anyone to do anything.

I mean, these bulbs look pretty helpless.

Bulbs

The Paperwhites do not like to grow in dirt, just rocks. Forcefully. I bought a bag of rocks also at Home Depot: $4.

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The bulbs are already growing in the package, so we had a one on one and I suggested to them that they grow in a bowl.  It’s cool, Paperwhites, nobody’s gonna hurt anybody.

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We’re gonna be like three little Fonzies here.

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Except then I decided that it looked better with four little Fonzies.

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I am hoping that these bowls are deep enough, I guess I’m going to find out.  The instructions said I should fill in with enough rocks to hold the bulbs in place and leave their noses showing.  I think I pretty much nailed it.  And I ran out of rocks.

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I added water just below the base of the bulbs. You want to make sure it stays at this level and the water shouldn’t touch the bulbs because they could rot. Action shot, revel in it.

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I’m moving them to a cool, dark room and then a few weeks, I can move them to a sunny windowsill with the hopes they will flower.

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These little bastards better not let me down.

Team Paperwhites.


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Leftover Turkey Sandwich

posted by on 11/24/2012

My dad made this sandwich every Thanksgiving weekend with the leftover turkey. I made it yesterday and it’s pretty damn delicious. I think next year I’m going to serve it toasted with swiss cheese.

Leftover Turkey Sandwich

-bread (I used Rudi’s white)
-mayo
-cranberry jelly from a can
-lettuce
-leftover turkey

Directions

Put everything between two slices of bread and then eat the hell out of it.

When I bought the can of cranberry jelly earlier this week, the checkout lady gave me the side eye. It was worth it, this sandwich is delicious.

Tonight we are having turkey nachos.

Turkey turkey dee, turkey turkey dap, I eat the turkey and take a nap.

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