We have a small closet that is just off the kitchen and next to the garage entrance.  From the outside it appears to be a small, harmless closet. The inside looks like it is being used by Dexter.

It’s like the forgotten, scary corner of the house.  I refuse to hang anything up inside, the closet’s vibe is off. Off=filthy.  I did buy a pack of wooden hangers a month ago hoping to spiff it up a bit.  I’m thinking it didn’t work.

Whenever I am forced to interact with the closet, I always feel like I need to scrub myself thoroughly ala Silkwood style.  I threw our green picnic bag up on the shelf in August and haven’t opened the door since.  The lightbulbs were left behind by the previous owners and the fan I’ve been meaning to donate but I forgot where I had placed it and look, a package of sparklers.

None of this crap belongs in here. A camping stove sitting on a hammock in a bag next to a lone hair elastic?

A washcloth (maybe the floor was trying to clean itself), curtain tension rods that are broken, and a dust pan?  Sure, why the hell not.

I emptied out the closet and for a brief moment wanted to stuff everything back in the closet and call it good.

After I vacuumed the floor, I decided everything needed to be painted.  I cleaned the baseboards and caulked the top.

I’m not sure if this crappy photo accurately portrays just how dirty and yellow the inside of this closet really is.

If that photo doesn’t, this one might.

I took the dumb closet doors off and put them in the garage, they were making it almost impossible to paint.  We are planning on replacing all of our craptastic, beat up doors in the house anyway and maybe not having a door will motivate us.  I’m actually *this* close to taking all the doors off.

It took three coats of paint over the span of a few days, but I brought this doorless closet back to life.  I didn’t paint the inside with a stencil or cover the entire thing with letter pressed wallpaper.  I’m not going for pinnable, just for “serial killers that may or may not smoke meth in this closet don’t live here”.

I opted to not bring back the pack of sparklers and the fan. I brought in two of Jeff’s helmets and hung up his motorcycle jackets along with our heavy winter coats.  Jeff mostly uses the garage entrance, so it will be easy for him to access his things-especially without a damn door on the closet.

I even rounded up his riding gloves because nothing says straight ninja like retrieving your stuff out of a lined wicker basket from Pier One.

This closet is clean, y’all.  CLEAN.

For 31 days, I’m tackling the Hot Mess.  Read all about it here.