SJP Is So Disappointed With Me Right Now.

posted by on 07/25/2011 | 1,537 comments (leave one of your own)

Hi friends.  Thank you for being so nice about our impending homelessness.  My friend Amanda reminded me how well
being homeless and living in a van worked out for Jewel, so maybe I should learn how to play guitar.  And then record number one albums.  Just me and Napoleon and my guitar living on the open road.  Or perhaps I could just buy an RV and make hash in the washing machine and we could sell it at the farmers market. I mean, it is Colorado, you can sell anything to anyone. Just be sure and have a valid prescription.  I need to keep it legit.

Clearly my future is bright, y’all.

Anyrandombagofcrap, remember that time I was all, “I look just like Sarah Jessica and I am a winner at clothes“?  I totally have no business shopping, I probably should save our dollars for life on the road, but it was cute. On the hanger.


To review, I will be 35 tomorrow, have no place to live and have no idea how to dress myself.  Unless someone invites me to a toga party.  Where I might need to nurse a baby.  Then I am going to be the best dressed muthafucka there.  Stop into tomorrow for a totally asian giveaway and ZDub fun facts.

Jewel and Nancy Botwin dreams,

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